Sharksmas Carols: Let it Clowe

by ievans on Dec 10, 2010 5:49 PM PST

Ok, gloom and doomers, time to cheer the hell up! It's the Magical Holiday Season, where spoiled children get Ovechkin jerseys to give the family some joy for the first time since Daddy got in trouble and Nicole the au-pair had to move out!

Ha, he's got his glasses on wrong

You're all doing something wrong in this picture

So, in this spirit of giving and happiness, I'd like to present the first of what I hope is many Sharksmas Carols you all can sing as you gather around the Kelp Tree and drink some hot chum. Here's that old winter-time classic, "Let it Clowe".

Ryane Clowe makes Brookbank smell his knuckles, which he dabs with vanilla oil to make it more pleasant for the guy he's pounding the bejesus out of

Oh your stickhandling is frightful
But your board-work is so delightful
You look great with that cut near your nose
Let it Clowe, let it Clowe, let it Clowe

George Parros is yours for mopping
When the gloves you wear are dropping
The amount of shit you take is low
Let it Clowe, let it Clowe, let it Clowe

But you can do a lot more than fight
Assisting on plays that at first look forlorn
You score big goals from way in tight
Sounding off the big ol' Tank horn

Oh the time on the clock is dying
After 4 on 4 with the game a tying
Forehand to backhand, then roofed, a shootout goal
Let it Clowe, let it Clowe, let it Clowe!

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I want to hear you sing it! ;-P

"Take a deep breath sometimes, a break, and play some hockey."
"Hockey is a great way to take a pause from day-to-day hard work." -- Lt Gen. D.H. Huntoon Jr. (paraphrased)

by Soloact on Dec 10, 2010 6:35 PM PST reply actions

Oh you can.

ievans and The ievans Experience Featuring ievans Presents:
’Tis the Friesen
A Holiday Music Sampler Benefitting The Jeff Friesen ~~Tax Dodge~~ Foundation, providing support for failed breakaways

With special guests:
Diddy, Wayne Newton, William Hung, that one chick who got kicked off that singing competition show in like week 4, the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus, Whitney Houston’s Cracked Out Ass, the guy from the Fugees that’s not Wyclif, Captain Sensible (formerly of the Damned), the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, the other other guy from the Black Eyed Peas, Sponge Bob and Friends, Mark Smith’s Terrible Grunge Band (nice guy, though), probably Snoop Dogg, Buck Cherry (we promised them a k of dirty heroin and some antibiotics if they show up), and ₭€¥$ha (we’re legally obligated to inform you this is not the pop singer Ke$ha)

by ievans on Dec 10, 2010 7:18 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs

Haha

Nice.

I was totally about to post one of these too.

Which I’m off to do now.

I just talk a lot and somehow accidentally say things that sound smart. It’s all smoke and mirrors, I tell ya.

by Auth0r on Dec 10, 2010 6:39 PM PST reply actions

I feel inspired....

I wanna write a Sharks Holiday Classic too!!!
Well, maybe… eventually!
Great stuff!

by Catstoy on Dec 10, 2010 10:48 PM PST reply actions

Front page city, this is awesome.

"San Jose is where I want to be at the end of the day, and there's an opportunity now to make it there. It is where my heart is." - Jamie McGinn, 2/22/10
Fear The Fin: Where Selling Your Soul Is The Likely Solution

by Mr. Plank on Dec 10, 2010 10:53 PM PST reply actions