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Wear Patrick Marleau’s dick trick on a shirt

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The moment you’ve all been waiting for.

From the moment Patrick Marleau did what Joe Thornton only spoke of doing, I knew he deserved something special to commemorate the achievement. Now he, and the rest of us, have that something special. Introducing the Commemorative Patrick Marleau Dick Trick T-Shirt from our friends over at Breaking T.

I can’t promise this shirt will help you score four goals in a single game; in fact, it almost certainly won’t help you get the job done, but it has it all. Four pucks, a rooster with gorgeous eyebrows and even a beautiful dorsal fin to top it all off. You can pick up your shirt via this link and impress your friends and family with your timeliness and wit.

Still not over Marleau’s four-goal game? Don’t worry, neither are the rest of us. You can relive it at the link below. I’ll be staring at the door, waiting for this shirt to show up.