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Sharks Gameday: Toothpaste Makes My Orange Juice Sour

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6:00 PST

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Series

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Series Preview

Television

Versus

Radio

98.5 KFOX, Sjsharks.com

Antagonists

Abel to Yzerman Winging It In Motown

And so it begins.

There has been a fair amount of rumbling around Fear The Fin about how important tonight is, and I couldn’t agree more. San Jose just flat out can’t spot Detroit a 1-0 lead, sit around for two days to think about it, and then be forced into a must-win situation a mere sixty minutes into the series.

Most important game of the series until eliminations, really. Tonight sets the tone.

Series preview can be found here. At this point, not much else you can say except what’s already been said:

The Detroit Red Wings. Ponder that name for a minute. Let it marinate in your mouth. Let that red and white seep into your pores, let it consume your soul. Allow visions of Tomas Holmstrom and Chris Osgood to run wild in your mind; lifting Lord Stanley for all the world to see, drinking it’s sweet nectar. Feel the Dark Side coarse through your veins. Accept it as a part of you, permit it entrance to the back of your throat till it becomes almost too much to bear.

Then spit that vile creature out.

Crush it beneath the soles of your shoes. Forsake every nightmare inducing memory from your cortex, erase the last four years of disappointment. Forget everything you think you know about your own dreams and aspirations. Understand that the next sixty minutes will not guarantee a damn thing. But understand that the next sixty minutes will show us everything.

Anyone who tells you tonight is just another game doesn’t have a pulse.

Let’s kick in the door and raise some hell.

– Detroit

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Bold Claims with Gary Busey: Detroit Edition

  • Joe Thornton has three goals and six assists in the Sharks series win.
  • Thomas Greiss makes an appearance. Chris Osgood makes two.
  • Dave Valentine will make at least one comment during the course of the series. Everyone will rec it. He will be flattered, and offer the entire community a Worther’s Original.
  • Joe Pavelski will be held off the board during the first two games at HP Pavilion, but will notch the winning goal in game three at Joe Louis.
  • Brian Rafalski gives up his hockey career and finally pursues a life long dream of playing Cecil Turtle in a Warner Brothers motion picture.
  • The Sharks only give up one power play goal at home all series long.
  • They convert in the 35% range with the man advantage in HP Pavilion. Dany Heatley has two of those.
  • Logan Couture has a breakout series. The “Bust” meme lives to see another day.
  • TCY continues to misinterpret the meaning of that phrase whenever Couture scores.
  • You watch this and don’t know how to feel about it for a couple days.
  • Tin foil sells out in the greater Detroit area by the end of the weekend.

Prediction: Sharks win 3-2. Goals by Heatley, Boyle, and McGinn. Douglas Murray and Niklas Kronwall collide at center ice in the second period, causing all remaining Sharks home games to be held at the Cow Palace.

Go Sharks.

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