The Morning After: Coping with running into a hot goaltender

So your team just got shut out by [insert name here. it’s probably Mike Smith]? Not scoring is a problem for many NHL teams these days and it’s nothing to be embarrassed about. We’re here to help. Let’s walk through the steps of coping with one of the most frustrating types of losses there are.

Don’t be afraid to vent

Listen, we all hate Mike Smith. Search your feelings, you know this to be true. But other guys, like the Brian Elliott’s of the world, just aren’t as easy to hate. Who even is Elliott? What’s his deal? Who knows and, more importantly, who cares?

Anyway, let the world know. Post some tweets, write a long rant on Facebook, send a letter to your ex letting them know how similar they are to the goalie in question (editor’s note: please don’t do this). This is a part of the grieving process.

Look at the positives

Okay, so your team didn’t score any goals. That sucks. But think of how many times they almost scored! They were extremely close to doing the one thing that matters for winning games on numerous occasions, which is nothing to sneeze at. Unless you’re allergic to almost finishing, which is something you should see your doctor about.

Additionally, think about a player on your team that in particular played really well. Maybe he had a few shots on goal that were miraculously kept out of the back of the net. Focus on the positives! It’ll change your life! Especially if you’re a fan of a team that hasn’t ever won anything, which I do not know anything about.

Remember the time your goalie saved your butt

Turns out being shut out is a lot less fun than when your goalie shuts out the other team. Go back and watch those highlights and try to see it from the other team’s perspective. See, we’re not so different after all. Some of us hate teams that were one color, and most of us hate the team that wears the Ducks colors. It all works out.

These highlight videos can be cathartic and they lead to the next step.

Watch your favorite team highlight videos

You know what they are. These get you through tough days at work, school and through generally surviving in the mortal plane of existence. This is the final step of the process as it gets you back liking hockey again, something you swore you’d never do in the first step of our process. After this, you’re ready to rejoin society and move on from that loss you hardly remember now.

Godspeed.