Here at Fear The Fin, we pride ourselves on providing intelligent discourse for San Jose Sharks fans. Sure we have a fair amount of dick jokes wedged into the crevices of our material, but the root of our mission statement this offseason is simple- don’t do anything rash and blow it up, because this team still has a window of opportunity. Not too high, not too low. If we got too low we’d be on the Golden Gate with three pounds of bricks strapped to our chest, and if we got too high we’d be all over that bag of Doritos by the way man can I have some they look so good- oh, we also like to digress.
But I, well, yeah. But I digress.
For the next two days, fuck all that. The second round is here and we’re deprived of some damn fine heartbreak. Scream all you want, throw out some ludicrous trades, yell about the lack of “heart” and “will to win”, call for some heads, blame Claude Lemieux for turning the Hockey Gods against us. Act like you’re the bearded lady at the goddamn county fair for all I care.
In fact, I’ll start.
THIS TEAM HAS NO GODDAMN HEART! TRADE JOE FOR A BAG OF PUCKS!!!!1!!
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