Fear the Fin in Quarantine: Streaming Guide

Greetings hockey fans!

If you’re like me, you’re studiously observing California’s “shelter in place” order and social distancing yourself from everyone including the DoorDash driver. I completely understand and agree with the NHL and other major sports leagues’ decisions to shut down and try to slow the spread of the coronavirus. I’m doing my part and I hope you are too.

But that doesn’t mean you can’t miss hockey, so here’s some streaming ideas to help tide you over until sports return.

Movies

I won’t get into a debate about what are and are not the greatest hockey movies of all time, but I will tell you where you can get your hockey fix with some of the top movies.

Slap Shot
Streaming on: Starz

When you’re talking classic hockey films, this one jumps to the top of the list. Slap Shot stars Paul Newman as elder player/coach Reggie Dunlop.

Slap Shot 2: Breaking the Ice
Streaming on: N/A, you have to rent or buy to stream

Starring Stephen Baldwin, Slap Shot 2 follows the Charlestown Chiefs 25 years later. Yes, it happened. There was also a Slap Shot 3 starring the Hanson Brothers and Leslie Nielsen.

Miracle
Streaming on: Disney+, Netflix

We just passed the 40th anniversary of Team USA’s epic gold medal win at the 1980 Olympics in Lake Placid, so it’s the perfect time to watch, or rewatch, Miracle.

The Mighty Ducks/D2/D3
Streaming on: HBO

From a ragtag team of peewee hockey players, to representing team USA at the Junior Games and high school antics, The Mighty Ducks trilogy is entertaining to say the least.

Disclaimer: This series is the reason that my son claims the Anaheim Ducks as his second favorite team, so watch with children at your own risk.

Goon
Streaming on: Netflix (both films)

Seann William Scott stars as an enforcer on a minor league hockey team, but he’s incredibly nice off the ice. The movie was so popular it spawned a sequel — Goon: Last of the Enforcers.

Youngblood
Streaming on: N/A, you have to rent/buy a physical copy

Rob Lowe stars as a budding American hockey star who needs to pay his dues in Canadian juniors.

Mystery, Alaska
Streaming on: Cinemax

David versus Goliath on ice. The hometown team in Mystery, Alaska takes on the New York Rangers. Look for an impressive national anthem from Little Richard.

Sudden Death
Streaming on: Starz

This is not a hockey movie technically, but anytime you can watch Jean-Claude Van Damme plant his foot in the neck of the Pittsburgh Penguins mascot, I am on board.

The Rocket
Streaming on: N/A, you have to rent or buy to stream

A Canadian biopic following the life of hockey legend Maurice “Rocket” Richard.

Happy Gilmore
Streaming on: Cinemax

Aspiring professional hockey player Happy Gilmore finds that his slap shot helps in more than one sport. There’s not a lot of hockey in this one, but it was Adam Sandler at his finest!

Tooth Fairy
Streaming on: N/A, you have to rent or buy to stream

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson as a minor league hockey player who finds out he’s also a Tooth Fairy.

Donald Duck Hockey Champ
Streaming on: Disney+

The 1939 cartoon where Donald Duck shows Huey, Duey and Louie his hockey skills.

Tough Guy: The Bob Probert Story
Streaming on: Amazon Prime

A documentary about Probert that includes interviews with his family, friends, teammates and rivals.

Ice Guardians
Streaming on: Netflix

A documentary covering the role of “enforcers” in the NHL.

Honorary Mentions

I have read that Les Boys is a great film series to stream, but sadly it’s filmed in French, so I did not include it. The Red Army is also supposed to be a great documentary that looks at the Russian team on the other side of the ice during Miracle.

Television

Hockey Wives
Streaming on: YouTube

Oh, the drama! Not really. This Canadian television series follows the lives of the wives and girlfriends of NHL players. In three seasons on air, the show featured the families of some former and current Sharks including Martine Auclair-Vlasic (wife of Marc-Edouard Vlasic), Brijet Whitney (wife of Ray Whitney) and Taylor Winnik (wife of David Winnik).

The Mighty Ducks Animated Series
Streaming on: Disney+

Yes, the movies sparked a very short-lived animated series. Think Duck Tales with a hockey twist, sort of.

The Simpsons
Streaming on: Disney+ (every single Simpsons episode is there!)

I can’t take credit for this entire list, because I stole most of it from VICE, which did a compilation of greatest Simpsons hockey moments in anticipation of Wayne Gretzky’s appearance on the show. I did add the later episodes with hockey and The Simpsons.

• Mr. Hockey (“Bart the Lover,” Season 3, 1992) — The one where Bart uses a picture of Gordie Howe to woo his teacher Edna Krabappel.
• “Treehouse House of Horror IV,” Season 5, 1993 — The Broadstreet Bullies star on the “Jury of the Damned” in this Treehouse of Horrors classic.
• “Lisa on Ice,” Season 6, 1994 — And starting in goal, Lisa Simpson. The middle Simpsons child laces up skates to pass PE. Everything’s fine until Bart and Lisa find themselves on opposite sides of the puck.
• “The Last Temptation of Krust,” Season 9, 1998 — a.k.a. the episode that pissed off the bigwigs in the NHL front office. I think most of us like things that make Gary Bettman mad.
• “Helter Shelter,” Season 14, 2002 — The Simpsons get box seats to a hockey game and Lisa makes friends with players on the ice.
• “Eeny Teeny Maya, Moe,” Season 20, 2009 — That time The Simpsons made fun of Don Cherry and Barry Melrose.
• “Angry Dad: The Movie,” Season 22, 2011 — It’s really just the opening sequence that’s a tribute to hockey, but it’s worth it.
• “The Nightmare After Krustmas,” Season 28, 2016 — Wayne Gretzky makes a cameo. Need I say more? /

Saturday Night Live
Streaming on: NBC, Hulu, Sling TV, YouTube TV

Wayne Gretzky reigns as the one and only hockey player to host Saturday Night Live. It happened during his final season with the Los Angeles Kings. You can find a clip of his fishing with the late, great Phil Hartman here.

Then there’s Chance the Rapper starring as hockey reporter Lazlo Holmes.

• Lazlo interviews P.K. Subban here.
• Lazlo interviews Auston Matthews here.
• Lazlo interviews Tuuka Rask here.
• Lazlo interviews Jonathan Marchessault here.
• Lazlo interviews Henrik Lundqvist here.
• Lazlo interviews Ryan O’Reilly here.  /

You can also go old school with Tracy Morgan by watching this 2012 clip where he spoofs the Flyers/Rangers here.

Seinfeld
Streaming on: Hulu

In “The Face Painter” episode, Elaine, Jerry and Kramer attend two New York Rangers versus New Jersey Devils playoff games where Elaine’s boyfriend paints his face in Devils colors.

Friends
Streaming on: Streaming cable subscription services

In “The One with George Stephanopoulos” Ross takes a puck right to the face at Madison Square Garden and then ends up at the hospital.

Other

Sharks Highlights

CSN Bay Area is trying to keep Sharks fans hyped with a look at some of the past games. The latest videos include Tomas Hertl breaking down his four-goal game and Logan Couture talking to Brodie Brazil about that same game.

Brodie Brazil Twitter

If you’re not following Brodie Brazil on Twitter, you should. He’s covering the sports stoppage with daily YouTube posts and he tweets out when CSN is ready to play Sharks classic games, like Hertl’s four-goal game.

Previous Sharks Games

If you’re looking for classic Sharks games to stream, check out this 2015 post by Jake Sundstrom and Marcus White. You can usually find the games, or at least the highlights, on YouTube.

Barracuda vs. Ice Hogs

The two teams were so sad their game on March 17, 2020 was cancelled, they found a way to play it while still practicing social distancing. The Barracuda players played the Ice Hogs players on NHL20 and then streamed it on Twitch.tv.

I’m not kidding.

You can find it here.

Twitter/Twitch

Keep an eye on Twitter and Twitch because teams and their social media crews are trying to find ways to keep busy. The Washington Capitals announced that on March 24 they’ll start streaming EA Sports games with their Washington announcers.

#ALLCAPS Simulations starting next week on @NBCSWashington!

The Caps schedule of game sims, using @EASPORTSNHL 20, will begin on Tuesday, March 24th

Presentations will feature commentary from NBCSW’s announcers and are also available on @MonSportsNethttps://t.co/L11F4KSy7E

— Washington Capitals (@Capitals) March 20, 2020

While EA Sports NHL is predicting the outcome of all the games each day.

The #NHL20 Sim results are in.

Did your team win today? 🏒 pic.twitter.com/b1uxn0dfYQ

— #NHL20 (@EASPORTSNHL) March 20, 2020

I’m torn on this one, because while they predict the Sharks would have beat the Montreal Canadiens on March 19, they also predict that the Sharks will finish at the bottom of the Pacific Division (below the Los Angeles Kings and Anaheim Ducks).

This is the best list I could compile, but definitely add your own suggestions below!